stuffy room
crouded rows
number two pencils
questions nobody knows
no drinking water
or looking around
have to face forward
feet on the ground
so many questions
each with its own bubble
cant ask for help
that would cause trouble
no making noise
it breaks the concentration
keep turning the page
with no hesitation
a big waste of time
to see what we know
hours of thinking
makes time go by slow
certain pages say stop
so we dont skip ahead
then we just sit
relieving stress from our head
we hear the bell
and rush to the door
we all seem to forget
when we come back there is more
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
gods angel donna
my new mom
in lots of pain
they dont know whats wrong
maby something in her brain
shes got tons of family
and a lot of support
so no matter what happens
we'l be there for her
she needs to get tested
to see whats wrong
so she can get help
so she can move along
i keep my thoughts up
and pray every night
i know god will listen
he will help her fight
shes a great person
one thats hard to find
one of gods angels
and one of a kind
in lots of pain
they dont know whats wrong
maby something in her brain
shes got tons of family
and a lot of support
so no matter what happens
we'l be there for her
she needs to get tested
to see whats wrong
so she can get help
so she can move along
i keep my thoughts up
and pray every night
i know god will listen
he will help her fight
shes a great person
one thats hard to find
one of gods angels
and one of a kind
my vows
these vows are all my promises
or everything i will do
there more then words on paper
but a way to prove i love you
love is a big word
that is why i say it to you
but the words that mean the most
are the two words " i do "
" i do " means forever
but that is not that long
its only great if spent together
our love will always be strong
as our rings are put on our fingers
we will become one
two people brought together
living in unison
i stand here before god
and all the world to see
to show how serius i am
and how much you mean to me
i promis to be faithful
and to only love you
and i mean all these promises
the moment i say " i do "
for better or for worse
ill be right by your side
my feelings you'll always know
from you i will never hide
for richer or for poorer
id live in a box
i couldnt want more
you fill my heart to the top
today is the begging
of our life spent together
you'll have a friend for life
but a companion forever
or everything i will do
there more then words on paper
but a way to prove i love you
love is a big word
that is why i say it to you
but the words that mean the most
are the two words " i do "
" i do " means forever
but that is not that long
its only great if spent together
our love will always be strong
as our rings are put on our fingers
we will become one
two people brought together
living in unison
i stand here before god
and all the world to see
to show how serius i am
and how much you mean to me
i promis to be faithful
and to only love you
and i mean all these promises
the moment i say " i do "
for better or for worse
ill be right by your side
my feelings you'll always know
from you i will never hide
for richer or for poorer
id live in a box
i couldnt want more
you fill my heart to the top
today is the begging
of our life spent together
you'll have a friend for life
but a companion forever
drugs
more and more
to ease your pain
so many drugs
just to feel sain
first you stop caring
then you cant think
your a worm on a hook
as stuck as fish bait
it becomes your life
now all that you do
you forgot your family
forgot to say i love you
people feel forgotten
and start to grow apart
there souls turn rotten
because of a broken heart
you try to fix it
but end up in relaps
i knew you couldnt change
that is just a fact
to ease your pain
so many drugs
just to feel sain
first you stop caring
then you cant think
your a worm on a hook
as stuck as fish bait
it becomes your life
now all that you do
you forgot your family
forgot to say i love you
people feel forgotten
and start to grow apart
there souls turn rotten
because of a broken heart
you try to fix it
but end up in relaps
i knew you couldnt change
that is just a fact
mom
your worse then him
your just a fake
you will not win
no more can you take
stop the lies
stop the act
your made of ice
and thats a fact
your not a victem
this was your choice
why did you choose them
it came from your voice
men cant help you
i tried and failed
you have to
but now your just stail
excuses and lies
pity and denile
look through your eyes
life is a trial
your just a fake
you will not win
no more can you take
stop the lies
stop the act
your made of ice
and thats a fact
your not a victem
this was your choice
why did you choose them
it came from your voice
men cant help you
i tried and failed
you have to
but now your just stail
excuses and lies
pity and denile
look through your eyes
life is a trial
shelly hottell
i never thought id see the day
when you would tell me that your sorry
and i never thought id hear you say
im sorry that i made you worry
well mom i forgive you
and thats all you had to say
but i have something to say too
and that is my pain wont go away
actions are the key
though words are nice to hear
its easy to deceive
and the truth people fear
mom i am not only proud of you
for the person you have become
i hope you know i always love you
but now you are number one
those few words from the heart
are what mean the most to me
its a begging and a start
and now i dont hurt so deeply
when you would tell me that your sorry
and i never thought id hear you say
im sorry that i made you worry
well mom i forgive you
and thats all you had to say
but i have something to say too
and that is my pain wont go away
actions are the key
though words are nice to hear
its easy to deceive
and the truth people fear
mom i am not only proud of you
for the person you have become
i hope you know i always love you
but now you are number one
those few words from the heart
are what mean the most to me
its a begging and a start
and now i dont hurt so deeply
my sick boyfriend
i dont know how you are
or what has gone wrong
because you arnt at school today
my txt are unanswered all day long
i worry because i love you
i love you and i care
i also miss you to
without you i am bare
i hope your safe at home
and not in any danger
without you im alone
even i feel like a stranger
time goes by extremely slow
when your not right by my side
i only wish i could no
because worrying makes me cry
or what has gone wrong
because you arnt at school today
my txt are unanswered all day long
i worry because i love you
i love you and i care
i also miss you to
without you i am bare
i hope your safe at home
and not in any danger
without you im alone
even i feel like a stranger
time goes by extremely slow
when your not right by my side
i only wish i could no
because worrying makes me cry
snow
theres something about a snowflake
that brings joy into my eyes
because when i see that big white flake
it brings its own discuise
not only could it mean no school
and no work at all
but no more wheel barrels of leaves to pull
because today is the end of fall
we listen on the radio
to hear the weatherman say
there wont be any school tomorrow
and no school for today
that brings joy into my eyes
because when i see that big white flake
it brings its own discuise
not only could it mean no school
and no work at all
but no more wheel barrels of leaves to pull
because today is the end of fall
we listen on the radio
to hear the weatherman say
there wont be any school tomorrow
and no school for today
dad?????????
shes confused on why shes mad at hm
and why he doesnt care
she wants him to be her dad again
but knows those feelings they dont share
the only contact he makes with her
is when she makes him see
how much he makes her suffer
and how much he makes her bleed
some people say its for attention
i tjought it was a cry for help
i couldnt take all the suspention
and i knew i couldnt end it myself
he doesnt know to this day
the pain she feels inside
she almost took her own life away
but knows the pain confirms shes still alive
and why he doesnt care
she wants him to be her dad again
but knows those feelings they dont share
the only contact he makes with her
is when she makes him see
how much he makes her suffer
and how much he makes her bleed
some people say its for attention
i tjought it was a cry for help
i couldnt take all the suspention
and i knew i couldnt end it myself
he doesnt know to this day
the pain she feels inside
she almost took her own life away
but knows the pain confirms shes still alive
daddy through my eyes
when i was a little girl
i looked into my daddys eyes
and when he said he loved me
it wasnt a big suprise
i said i love you to daddy
more then my arms go wide
but all those feelings changed for me
the day daddy made me cry
he left when i was young
and rarely did he come back
i always bit my tounge
when mommy said. daddy loves you back
the older that i got
the more daddy made me cry
though it came as less a shock
when he told another lie
daddy always had an excuse
so the further we grew apart
daddy wouldnt even stop drug use
thats when i knew daddy didnt have a heart
i looked into my daddys eyes
and when he said he loved me
it wasnt a big suprise
i said i love you to daddy
more then my arms go wide
but all those feelings changed for me
the day daddy made me cry
he left when i was young
and rarely did he come back
i always bit my tounge
when mommy said. daddy loves you back
the older that i got
the more daddy made me cry
though it came as less a shock
when he told another lie
daddy always had an excuse
so the further we grew apart
daddy wouldnt even stop drug use
thats when i knew daddy didnt have a heart
unthoughtful dad
she tells him she loves him
another mistake
she always forvives him
though his words are still fake
her feelings slip
he sneaks right in
plays a guilt trip
and it all starts again
she is the daughter
and more mature
he is the father
what a figure
whoever thought
love is all you need
must of forgot
people love greed
another mistake
she always forvives him
though his words are still fake
her feelings slip
he sneaks right in
plays a guilt trip
and it all starts again
she is the daughter
and more mature
he is the father
what a figure
whoever thought
love is all you need
must of forgot
people love greed
parents
im glad your life is great
because without me you seem fine
i know that i can move on from this
and that healing takes some time
i seem to learn the hard way
but beleive me im doing great
because in my years to come
i will soon just walk away
you like to take the credit
for the great things that i do
sorry to let you down
but i didnt learn them from you
instead i saw what i didnt like
from you and all your flaws
then i knew what not to do
and that made me stop and pause
so i guess you get a tadbit credit
not something you hould praise
and now o am the oppisite of you
and i thank god of that everyday
because without me you seem fine
i know that i can move on from this
and that healing takes some time
i seem to learn the hard way
but beleive me im doing great
because in my years to come
i will soon just walk away
you like to take the credit
for the great things that i do
sorry to let you down
but i didnt learn them from you
instead i saw what i didnt like
from you and all your flaws
then i knew what not to do
and that made me stop and pause
so i guess you get a tadbit credit
not something you hould praise
and now o am the oppisite of you
and i thank god of that everyday
the old man i got to know
one day as we were driving by
i saw a old man sitting on the side
he asked for money, i asked him why
then he looked at me and started to cry
i gave him my change
and i took a seat
he showed me his things
and a old cantine
he asked if i
assumbed it was beer
i answered yes
he said thats not fair
i know i am dirty
and egging is cheap
but i am to old for working
and my wife wont wake from her sleep
i sit on this corner
and pray everyday
that my ife knows i love her
and im glad her pain went away
though i know she is gone
i still miss her so
i can never move on
untill its my time to go
i saw a old man sitting on the side
he asked for money, i asked him why
then he looked at me and started to cry
i gave him my change
and i took a seat
he showed me his things
and a old cantine
he asked if i
assumbed it was beer
i answered yes
he said thats not fair
i know i am dirty
and egging is cheap
but i am to old for working
and my wife wont wake from her sleep
i sit on this corner
and pray everyday
that my ife knows i love her
and im glad her pain went away
though i know she is gone
i still miss her so
i can never move on
untill its my time to go
window veiw
when i look out my window
i see a big old empty world
its full of all these people
but where is there soul
everyone has a boss
they always do what ther told
they dont know what theyv'e lost
because there heart has grown cold
money can buy items
but it cant buy you love
freinds you cant buy them
and trust doesnt come with a shove
life doesnt fit on a squedule
and its changing all the time
you should live for the moments
life does have a deadline
i see a big old empty world
its full of all these people
but where is there soul
everyone has a boss
they always do what ther told
they dont know what theyv'e lost
because there heart has grown cold
money can buy items
but it cant buy you love
freinds you cant buy them
and trust doesnt come with a shove
life doesnt fit on a squedule
and its changing all the time
you should live for the moments
life does have a deadline
deppression
depression is a feeling
a great pain inside
all your layers are peeling
even happiness and pride
you succomb to the darknes
the light is just to bright
you havent got a harness
on why you want to cry
theres easy ways to fix it
none of wich are safe
you dont know why you feel it
now your bodies like a cave
your feelings have you surrounded
by then you are trapped
then everything darkend
and there was no going back
a great pain inside
all your layers are peeling
even happiness and pride
you succomb to the darknes
the light is just to bright
you havent got a harness
on why you want to cry
theres easy ways to fix it
none of wich are safe
you dont know why you feel it
now your bodies like a cave
your feelings have you surrounded
by then you are trapped
then everything darkend
and there was no going back
love at the hayfork fair
she was first to say goodbye
he was the last to say hello
they didnt want to think
about tomorrow
he said i love you
she said i love you to
but before you go
i have something to tell you
she met him at fair
he was prince charming
she loved his hair
and personality
he was kind
he had all the right things to say
she melted in his arms
every hour every day
on the last day of fair
he said his goodbyes
said he had to move
far away
far away was idaho
she said i cant let you go
i love you please stay
i love you please stay
he was the last to say hello
they didnt want to think
about tomorrow
he said i love you
she said i love you to
but before you go
i have something to tell you
she met him at fair
he was prince charming
she loved his hair
and personality
he was kind
he had all the right things to say
she melted in his arms
every hour every day
on the last day of fair
he said his goodbyes
said he had to move
far away
far away was idaho
she said i cant let you go
i love you please stay
i love you please stay
grampa fred
you live your life
with no regrets
we will always love you
i will never forget
your preshus memory
sticks to my mind
i will always love you
everyday and all the time
i will miss you all the time
then i will remember
how you brought
joy in to my life
you live your life
with no regrets
you did your deeds
now its time to spread your wings
with no regrets
we will always love you
i will never forget
your preshus memory
sticks to my mind
i will always love you
everyday and all the time
i will miss you all the time
then i will remember
how you brought
joy in to my life
you live your life
with no regrets
you did your deeds
now its time to spread your wings
foster home journey
she wants to know
she wants to go
everybody thinks she'll grow
to this new place
she wants to find out
she wants to learn
but she's still trying
to see there faces
its hard to see
its hard to try
when she's looking for her mom
and if she's alive
she has to stay strong
she doesn't want to cry
she wants to fight
because they all think they know her life
she wants to belong
she feels all wrong
at least she made it through
another cloudy day
she wants to go
everybody thinks she'll grow
to this new place
she wants to find out
she wants to learn
but she's still trying
to see there faces
its hard to see
its hard to try
when she's looking for her mom
and if she's alive
she has to stay strong
she doesn't want to cry
she wants to fight
because they all think they know her life
she wants to belong
she feels all wrong
at least she made it through
another cloudy day
barely a father
you said you were my father
that lie i can't beleive
you said i was your daughter
are you sure thats really me
i won't beleive your lies
you never tell the truth
you think your in discuise
i have beyound enough proof
a daughter loves her father
he's supposed to show it back
you dont even bother
as a father you turned your back
that lie i can't beleive
you said i was your daughter
are you sure thats really me
i won't beleive your lies
you never tell the truth
you think your in discuise
i have beyound enough proof
a daughter loves her father
he's supposed to show it back
you dont even bother
as a father you turned your back
kirk hottell
life has been hard
the pain has been great
i waited for you
but you came to late
i waited for years
for you to come rescue me
but you left me in tears
you gave up so easily
the others dont care
i took it to heart
they dont think i should share
my words are to harsh for your heart
my words wern't always mean
i loved you unconditionally
i was always on your team
when you were my family
nowmy pain has gone bitter
and you don't understand
actions speak louder then words
is that such a big demand
the pain has been great
i waited for you
but you came to late
i waited for years
for you to come rescue me
but you left me in tears
you gave up so easily
the others dont care
i took it to heart
they dont think i should share
my words are to harsh for your heart
my words wern't always mean
i loved you unconditionally
i was always on your team
when you were my family
nowmy pain has gone bitter
and you don't understand
actions speak louder then words
is that such a big demand
alone
again and again
she hid her feelings within
her hopes her dreams
her spirit had broken
they didn't know why
they didn't care
so she screamed and she yelled
but noone could hear
she ran to her room
feeling very alone
then she stared at her blade
convinced that would send her home
her mom came to her room
knowing she had made a mistake
but when she walked in the room
her daughter was dead laying next to the blade
she knelt down to feel but there was no heartrate
she read a small piece of paper wrapped around the blade
in bold letters it said you were always to late
i cried and i prayed but my feelings were delayed
she hid her feelings within
her hopes her dreams
her spirit had broken
they didn't know why
they didn't care
so she screamed and she yelled
but noone could hear
she ran to her room
feeling very alone
then she stared at her blade
convinced that would send her home
her mom came to her room
knowing she had made a mistake
but when she walked in the room
her daughter was dead laying next to the blade
she knelt down to feel but there was no heartrate
she read a small piece of paper wrapped around the blade
in bold letters it said you were always to late
i cried and i prayed but my feelings were delayed
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
another liar
words are words
you tell them well
i beleived them all
untill i fell
i fell so low
i saw your plans
i watched your actions
and listened to your scams
it was hard at first
i felt your pain
i stayed around
but YOU never came
you have a new family
to fill your heart
so you forgot about us
what you did was...restart
i know my place now
you move on and forget
were just kids you got stuck with
now we dont fit
so while you move on
i'll do just the same
you think its my fault
you have only yourself to blame
you tell them well
i beleived them all
untill i fell
i fell so low
i saw your plans
i watched your actions
and listened to your scams
it was hard at first
i felt your pain
i stayed around
but YOU never came
you have a new family
to fill your heart
so you forgot about us
what you did was...restart
i know my place now
you move on and forget
were just kids you got stuck with
now we dont fit
so while you move on
i'll do just the same
you think its my fault
you have only yourself to blame
when mom moved away
it will be the last
I see of her
she's gone away
gone for sure
she won't look back
she think's he's safe
come to help her
and find her place
she'll go with him
all alone
he'll trap her there
she won't come home
a sad day will come
when were all dressed in black
he said it was a accident
she fell on her back
she never learned
those men were bad
never loved her
but wanted what she had
she refused all warnings
wouldnt look at the facts
instead she left
but she did come back
she lays in a coffin
with flowers in her bed
finally at rest
only to be dead
I see of her
she's gone away
gone for sure
she won't look back
she think's he's safe
come to help her
and find her place
she'll go with him
all alone
he'll trap her there
she won't come home
a sad day will come
when were all dressed in black
he said it was a accident
she fell on her back
she never learned
those men were bad
never loved her
but wanted what she had
she refused all warnings
wouldnt look at the facts
instead she left
but she did come back
she lays in a coffin
with flowers in her bed
finally at rest
only to be dead
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